Thank You

Photo courtesy of St Mark of the Road, Mark Dyde.

Hello Dear Reader

Almost exactly to the hour, two weeks ago I was standing on the stage of the Royal Albert Hall with my merry band of insanely gifted men and women.

It was the greatest night of my life.

It went by in what felt like seconds and I still want to weep with gratitude when I think about it. And when I think about it, it’s not whether it was or wasn’t technically excellent, or that I managed not to miss any of the most crucial cues that had been driving me mad in rehearsal, or that I knew I would mess up the intro to Blackbird and have to start again because I live in utter reverence of McCartney. I only remembered those bits just now.

For the rest of my life, when I think of that night it will be that roar when I walked out onto the stage and there you all were. So many of you. I could not believe it. I could not believe the love in that hall; a love built by us, between us, a love that was nothing to do with a person showing off on a stage going ‘Look at me! Look at me!’ It was more the love that expresses what it means to be an underdog, an also-ran, a whatever it is that keeps going when everything says to quit.

I think it was an emotion that expressed the way we feel about each other. Songs written over twenty-five years that have been a conversation between us. I have had the opportunity to get to know so many of you over the years, that I am often thinking of one of you in particular during one song, and then one of you in another. I know, for example, just how deeply some of you feel certain things when you listen to Blessèd. I know. I sing it for you with every ounce of my being so that if just for a second I can let you let go of that pain.

When I was a kid, I made a pact with God. I said to him, ‘let me do this thing I love, that I cannot not do, let me do it and I will do it as service. I can’t be a nun God, ‘cause I fancy boys too much, but I can write my songs and sing them and hope that in those moments when people hear them they are moved enough to feel that they can keep going too.’

Honestly? I feel like to write anything else right now would be to sully it. It was such a moment. It was so many things I still cannot find the words for.

So for now, let me just say again, Thank You. I sing for you, therefore I am. And when I am with you, singing for you, I am finally myself. Thank you for letting be myself.

With love as ever,

Nerina xxx

P.S. Real news coming tomorrow. Keep an eye out.